Member Bio

Captain Ron has been a fixture in the Jackson Hole Community Band since 1990, though no one can recall ever actually seeing him fill out a membership form. He simply showed up one day in the back row with a Tuba, that signature slouchy beret-thing on his head, and a smirk—and never left.

Joining the band just a year after its birth in ’89, Captain Ron staked his claim early—and he’s been holding down the back row-lowbrow humor ever since. If you hear a blat echoing off the walls, that’s probably Ron’s Tuba, or maybe his signature sound effect punctuating one of his notoriously off-color jokes.

Ron’s musical résumé reads like a Jackson Hole legend’s scavenger hunt: founding member of the Phat Bastards, staple in the Hoffband, frequent disruptor in the Brass Quintet, and crashing just about any other group brave enough to let him in.

A master of volume—both sound and sarcasm—Ron’s contributions to the band are legendary. Not always for their accuracy—though he can play when the mood strikes—but for the color commentary and unsolicited wisdom he offers from his throne in the low brass section. His ongoing commentary and puns are rarely asked for, but never forgotten.

Never one to embrace paperwork, Ron has steadfastly refused to fill out the official member form, so editing this bio himself is about as likely as him volunteering to play Piccolo. That means we get to tell the truth—and then some.

Ron claims to be low-tech to a fault—yet somehow, he’s managed to land himself a Facebook account. His go-to line? “You can tell I’m lying because my lips are moving.” So if, by some cosmic glitch, he actually reads this… consider it a challenge. C’mon, Captain—let’s see you rewrite it. Blat us proud.

— Authored by Julie... and yes, you really should’ve bought a squirrel.